Pharmaceutical Skeptic Pillows

"Do a double-blind test. Give the new drug to rich patients and a placebo to the poor. No sense getting their hopes up. They couldn't afford it even if it works."

Calm down...this is for your own good.

We at pharmacorp are 100% behind the benefits of spiritual and artistic therapies which is why we've developed 'megazymol' to enhance the experience!

'Yep, just as I thought... Prescription drug deficiency.'

'They don't have any side effects, nor any other effect whatsoever!'

'I'm going to give you a prescription for some drug I saw on TV.'

'You should probably just ignore that. Your insurance doesn't even begin to cover it.'

"You know it's the American drug companies that give you the headache that is cured by the pills they sell you."

"Well ...yes . The side effect of hair loss can be rather abrupt !

"Everyone at Megadrug is committed to the benefits of spoken therapies, which is why we developed 'nitrazone' to enhance the experience."

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

"Let me assure you that my congressional delegation and I are devoting our full attention to the harmful effects of e-cigarettes. . ."

"OK. . .stain, aspirin, water tablet, B12 vitamin, and whisky."

"Quick! Act like we just developed a drug that they can sell for seven thousand dollars a pill."

"Nice try, Jim, but there's no such thing as a 'Beer cleanse'."

"Didn't I warn you about buying medication from the internet?!"

'There's nothing wrong with him-just delusions of glandular.'

"He's so anti-regulation he won't even take a laxative."

"Republicans, Democrats...as long as they keep getting sick, we'll be all right."

"Look on the bright side – the Rogaine worked!"

'Too much Omega 3.'

'Where exactly did you get this 'Lifestyle Guru' from?'

'Frank, leak to the tabloids that these slow moving broccoli flakes cure cancer.'

Man sees hug capsules: 'Not to be taken Orally.'

'Look, half the work is done! All you need to do is fill in the top part so we can legally say the bottom part.'

'...the side effects of this designer drug are more beneficial than it's intended use!'

"At this point, we know it's addictive."

August, 1897 - Arthur Eichengrun invents aspirin.

The council wanted us to have a Healthy Lifestyle Monitor

"Whoa! Now I remember. This was one of the possible side effects on the label."

"Sometimes I wonder about what our patients have to take."

"In order to get through this, I've had to find an inner strength that I never knew I had in the medicine cabinet."

"Are you sure you don't want to try just one miracle drug before you die?"

"I'm putting you on a stronger placebo."

Prozac, Lexapro and Lithium.