Pets Nutritionist Pillows

'You're lucky you can't read.'

"Watch out, Simone's hangry - her stomach AND her throat are growling."

"Odd, since neither of us overfeeds her by even the smallest amount."

'One final question.. what's your policy on table scraps?'

'My owner is feeding me way too much organic food.'

"Is that all they taught him at obedience school? How to use a can opener?"

"Alright, alright! I'll stop buying the cheap stuff, OK?"

"That's it - your diet starts tomorrow"

'You put him on a diet, so he put you on a diet.'

"I can't believe how much I love her. Just look at those sienna eyes and that adorable little nose. I honestly don't know how I'd survive without her." "He has food."

'She feeds me, walks me, washes me, and picks up after me...yet...I'm supposed to be man's best friend?'

"You say you're flossing, but I'm scraping off a lot of tennis ball fuzz."

Free range cat food - mice running around the store.

"Last chance — where’s the wet food?"

The Catkins Diet

'No collar, no din-din,' said Mrs. Flint firmly. 'Omigosh,' thought Larry, 'Fifi will never give it back!'

'I don't think that brand of cat food is very healthy.'

'Have you put her on the strict diet I prescribed?'

Polly want a cracker?

Cat steals food from owner who is distracted by feeding the dog.

"It's the first edition of 'How dogs know what their owners are bringing home for dinner'."

'I don't care if top breeders do recommend it - I am not going to eat dog food!'

'I'm putting Babs on a diet. She's more paunch than pooch.'

"This is our new product consultant."

'He doesn't want to get fixed until you do.'

'Let's see...fever, rhinorrhea, chorea...Aha! canine distemper!'

'This, Sir, is what we call a Sertoli-cell tumor....'

"You might consider eliminating some of the roadkill from your diet."

'It's important to watch the amount of iron in his diet, too much and he'll only point north.'

"I've got a complaint about the table scraps you are feeding me...cut down on the fatty tissues...I'm gaining weight!"

'I think Pookie wants her supper.'

"Lemme guess. Kibble."

'It's nothing serious. You just have postman's elbow.'

'Normally, he's an indoor dog, but he got into the bean dip.'

'Not everything is a dog treat!'