Pet Vanity Aficionados Gifts

"I just got back from the groomer. Jealous?"

Cover Design for the Yellow Book, Vol 3- Street Lamps Lighting a Lady's Toilet Mirror

Man admiring his patterned clothes in the mirror

'Mommy puts on a disguise every time, before she goes to work.'

"The selfie of Dorian Gray"

"Do you think those sounds they make are some primitive attempt to communicate with each other?"

Dog Jogger

'I know how you feel.'

Extreme Vanity Press - Fall, 2007

'I'm sick and tired of begging!'

'I'm afraid to ask.'

Tanning Machine on the beach

Bill Jones - Bill Jones w/out makeup

"Okay, I admit it. You are a good dog."

"I only know 'Sit' and 'Stay.' "

Stars Without Make-Up.

"Of course I hear it when you say 'come'. I just choose to ignore it."

"I started plucking my eyebrows, and I couldn't stop..."

"Oh, it's nice, but it's not palazzo living."

'Oh, come on. . . you can't tell me Dasher hasn't had antler enhancement surgery!'

I'm the gorilla's nuts... I'm the dog's bo****ks... He's never been good at hiding his light under a bushel.

Trophy dog stick

"Whenever I go for a walk I accessorize. I call it bling with a purpose."

'Now THAT'S what I call a makeover!'

'I'd love to take a bath in milk. . . No, up to my neck.'

Vanity Ward - 'Cosmetic surgery.'

The Unsportables: Shot Put

"I'm not actually 40 this year but that's the birthday I celebrate every year."

'Celebrity autobiography editing'

'Make-Up'

Maude loved doggy fashion.

PlayDog.

'Poor old Rex looks gasping for a pint!'

'And this one is for first thing in the morning.'

"Let's see... I think we'll ignore our food, lick ourselves, then knock these flowers onto the floor."