Pet Storyteller T-Shirts

"When I was your age I would have snagged that before it hit the ground."

"It's the dog."

'You know, I almost envy you sometimes.'

"My owners named me Kvduer92hybH20UDF8fhsj becuase they wanted to remember a strong password for their online banking."

The Ferocious Viking Wiener Dog

"When I first arrived, Young Master was always with me and Old Master didn't want anything to do with me, nor it's the opposite: Go figure..."

'She's just great with the children.'

Around the Dogbox in 80 Days.

"I have a couple of other projects I'm excited about."

"Another slander suit!"

'He tells me there's one chapter of his memoir titled, 'My Likeable Master'.'

"I try to drink a lot of water, stay up and get right on L.A. time, and never eat the airline food."

Noah's Ark Book Shop has two doggie doors.

"I got the cream, but the bulk of the old lady's estate is going to auction."

"Stop playing dumb, young man. I wasn't pulled out of a hat yesterday."

"Forget George, he scarfs down everything in sight. Aunt Rose and Grandma are good for slipping us a slice. Most important, the kids are sloppy. We're bound to find some juicy scraps under their chairs. Stay alert!"

'Other than no dognip or an indoor bathroom, I enjoy being a dog.'

'Tarzan'

"I kid you not, he shot that duck right over the middle of the lake and said 'fetch'! Do you have any idea how cold that water is?!"

'Why in the world do you want to log on to the vet doctor. who did a 'fix' job on you?!'

'I don't get it. He had the smallest paws in the whole litter.'

Oh, good - Looks like the doctor's in.

"Well, team-sports are rather difficult to organise around here: Just keep practising your bilboqiet Darling..."

'Farm News' readers want to know about my childhood? Rather normal really: Lived in a pigsty, ate swill every day...'

"Didn't you find it attractive that he was a "Free Range Chicken'?"

Aesop's Fables - Dog and His Own Reflection

'Not so easy, is it?'

'The animal psychiatrist said don't bother him with dog things- he doesn't know he's a dog!'

'Well kiddo, I'm proud to say that in all my years of service, I've never lost a sheep...'

Prince longed for the good old days when dogs were dogs.

'Unfortunately The Hounds of The Baskerville were my role models.'

'I'm sorry, honey, but your dog Scraps has gone on to a better place now. I sold him to that family across the road with an inground pool.'

Curosity killed the cat

"When I was your age, I had to trudge 20 feet through thick shag carpet to a scratching post!"

Mother and Daughter.