Pet Smuggler T-Shirts

"Excuse me sir, no pets allowed!"

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

Barks in code.

"Why, you little Shih Tzu."

Thanks to her cat-cam, Cheryl was able to keep her furniture from being shredded while she was at work.

'Hey Harry, you know you've been walking around with a biscuit on your nose for the last two hours?'

"I didn't know she could body surf. Did you know she could body surf?"

"I never knew God was such a sports fan."

I'm at the shrub with the empty bag of pretzels we sniffed last week. Where are you?

Murder in Apartment 6-K

'The word bath is mentioned.'

'Marm doesn't understand, 'I've got it, I've got it'.'

Snooze buttons for cat owners

Sergeant Jones gave the assurance that they had an 'assortment' of leads back at the station. . .

Man to pets about upside down house: 'I don't care who started it!'

"Look, I tried to tell everyone Timmy was in the well but no, what do I know, I'm just a dog!"

"You go ahead and sleep, girl. I’m sure Philip Roth won’t be offended."

"Ok, Griffin — let him see Mom’s roast!"

'I taught him to shake hands, but I don't know where he got the joybuzzer!'

"If anyone should ask, I was in my doggy bed from 7 p.m. to midnight. Understand?"

"My client was across town at the time of the murder, as a quick sniff of Exhibit A will demonstrate."

'No cheating'

"Listen, that's a Tang Dynasty urn we just broke."

"Officer, my cat's stuck up a tree again"

Car Rides - Cats

'What makes you say the medication I prescribed for Fido is causing side effects?' 'Meow.'

'My husband's just getting some ready to show you.'

Dog excited watching a new tree being planted

"Look, if it wasn’t me and it wasn’t you, who was doing all the snoring?!"

Wanted dog! reward!

Cookie Thief

'Hey,mom-have you seen my pet frog?'

No, I seriously doubt a DNA test would exonerate you.

He Did It!

"Heyyy! Where the hell did you learn that trick?"