Pet Performers T-Shirts

'Everybody from Liverpool's a comedian.'

'My bark may be worse than my bite, but I've got a whine that will drive you up a wall!'

Dog looks perplexed as man has his head out the window taking in the beer smells.

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

Tell me again how aloof and independent cats are.

"The Bruins are down a goal. Do me a favor: Pretend you’re a Boston terrier."

"They're friendly, but they're also carnivorous, so remember that when you're called on to beg and roll over."

'You've made a powerful enemy'

"You understand that they call you 'good boy' because they can't remember your name, right? They never forget my name, they care about me..."

"This paw has you meeting a lovely poodle, an enchantress who will win your heart... but look, here, this is telling me she's lousy with fleas."

'I'll be glad when winter is over and he can start buryi8ng bones again.'

Fish with a human in a bowl.

'Ugh! Another oil puddle in the living room – bad robot dog!'

Cats at private view

"Mum, I got the job!"

"We're going to the Vet aren't we."

"I don't have the lip for saxaphone."

Dogs life

'Out, damned Spot.'

Cats are under tremendous peer pressure to remain useless.

'You're supposed to just lick the cone!'

Shaggy dog/Shaggy Owner.

Dog FM. (Man blowing dog whistle into radio microphone).

"Defense budget... Do you have any idea how much catnip $700 billion would buy?"

"You're missing the whole gestalt of Frisbee!"

"I'm not his best friend. But he is in my extended network."

Clown walks balloon dog

Mouse on an Exercise Bike

Sonata for Piano and Dog

"My pawprints? Nah, I wore gloves. They matched my noseprints on the window."

Talking Dog.

"His name's Bond. Mittens Bond."

'Now cut that out!'

Flowers? My girl prefers a dead mouse!

"Isn't it true that the prosecution offered you a bone to testify?"