Pet Pampering Enthusiast Gifts

WOOF WOOF EYE CHART

"Oh, stop whining. We ALL need a haircut."

"Go ahead, boy, dig in — it's your birthday!"

Lady asks footman to carry her dog as it is tired in the hot weather

"Would Sir care for ice in his drink?"

'If you ask me, he's glad the vet doesn't make house calls.'

'I'm increasing his quota of tummy rubs.'

'You spoil that hamster...'

Pampered Pets.

"He seems depressed."

Woman Curls Her Dog.

'She's sick as a dog, Doc!'

'I see! And, just how much will it cost if she is in season?'

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

"Look, children are just pathetic substitutes for people who can't have pets."

Why Poodles Become Killers

'You'll be getting $5,000 worth of doggy treats this week. If your owner sees the charge on his credit card, you don't know me.'

"What we have here is a severe case of over-growing."

'I'll have toast and he'll have a complete dog's breakfast.'

Dogs can dream too.

'Forget about building trust. Just give the dog a bath.'

My Bowl Is Empty.

Standard Poodle/Substandard Poodle

"You're spoiling that dog again!"

The pet elevator: Because sometimes the pet steps are just too much work.

"Do you prefer lavender scent or strawberry?"

The Clipping

'Excuse me, EXCUSE ME, what's that YOU'RE eating?!'

Dog Jogger

"Kibbled, canned and frozen were non-starters. But he'll often accept a ice ribeye as long as it's been properly dry aged."

"Hey, don't complain. They declawed me!"

'My personal trainer, massage therapists, hair stylist and chef.'

"You knew I was a clean breed when you got me."

'You say he's been shaking his head?'

"... and just a pinch of catnip for Oscar."