Pet Joker Prints

"Yeah, I don't like this part either."

'I'm 3 years old - that's 21 dog years - so start pouring!'

"And always remember...If you're going to be sick, always do it on the carpet. It's more absorbent."

"Hate to see you leave, Dave...especially since it was just last week that I learned you worked for me."

A pony throws its rider.

"Don’t worry. You’re looking at the Frederick H. Tuttle Middle School long-jump champion."

Just another day at Helium Farm

"I'm sorry, but I assumed it was a fancy dress costume..."

'He's allergic to talc! You'll have to give up the baby!'

Outback rat house? Darn ! Wish you guys would've said somethin' sooner. I just ate a hop pocket.

Dog responding to his master doing a crossword.

House with 'Dog For Sale' sign. Cat walks by holding 'Good Riddance' sign.

'You sure picked a great place to have kittens.'

"Has anyone fed the goldfish?"

'You can sniff out pet supplies on aisle five.'

Joe was so poor, his dog was a tumbleweed.

"Allow me to introduce my wife - she's been giving me the silent treatment since 1982."

"You know, your poker face is useless if you keep wagging your tail."

"Never mind about star signs what blood group are you"

"Let's see if we can't scatter the trash all over his desktop."

"I'm going out. Do you need any voles?"

"Ever since we got the Border collie, he colors within the lines."

"I was at a party and got some avocado dip in my eye..."

'Polo dear, we're going to play Polo, not Water-Polo...'

"I've got a dog licence. Will that do?"

Kid to dad about pet door on fishbowl: 'It's a dogfish.'

"My owner's been teaching me how to beg. . . I've made £30 today!"

"This old dog can learn new tricks. . . Watch me make this meat loaf disappear!"

"This is a letter from your teacher. Are you seriously eating your own homework?"

'He's a great dog...a bit of a drooler though.'

'Is he house-broken?'

'You don't have to worry about Rover not getting enough exercise, Edith. I signed him up at the health club.'

"Just stare up into the corner of the ceiling and growl. It really freaks him out."

'Great car-chasing scenes!'

Terrierists.