Pet Hierarchy Humorist T-Shirts

Dog orders cat to bring slippers for master.

"Well, ordinary men have colleagues. Successful men have victims."

'Finally! A meeting with one of the bigwigs.'

'My bark may be worse than my bite, but I've got a whine that will drive you up a wall!'

Dog looks perplexed as man has his head out the window taking in the beer smells.

"I need to see your budget proposal."

The Evolution of the Bonus

"The Bruins are down a goal. Do me a favor: Pretend you’re a Boston terrier."

Tell me again how aloof and independent cats are.

"You understand that they call you 'good boy' because they can't remember your name, right? They never forget my name, they care about me..."

"This paw has you meeting a lovely poodle, an enchantress who will win your heart... but look, here, this is telling me she's lousy with fleas."

'You've made a powerful enemy'

"We're all just a number here, Finch, and fortunately my number is one."

Doglike man to vampire: 'Call me an apprentice werewolf, or even a beginner werewolf, but don't call me an under werewolf!'

"They're friendly, but they're also carnivorous, so remember that when you're called on to beg and roll over."

'I'll be glad when winter is over and he can start buryi8ng bones again.'

Fish with a human in a bowl.

'Congratulations Smith, you got that promotion. Commiserations Reid, you got that demotion.'

"We're going to the Vet aren't we."

'Need I remind you who's boss here?'

Dogs life

"Stranger, you're sitting in the boss's personal spot. That's why they moved the dart board over your head."

Cats at private view

'Ugh! Another oil puddle in the living room – bad robot dog!'

'He takes his organization chart seriously.'

'Out, damned Spot.'

Cats are under tremendous peer pressure to remain useless.

'You're supposed to just lick the cone!'

"Satisfaction, stat!"

"Defense budget... Do you have any idea how much catnip $700 billion would buy?"

Zoo Inc. Management Structure

Shaggy dog/Shaggy Owner.

"I'm not his best friend. But he is in my extended network."

Conversation between Dogs.

"My pawprints? Nah, I wore gloves. They matched my noseprints on the window."