Pet Friend Confessor Pillows

Parrot Sign in a Pet Shop - Can keep a Secret.

Bitchbark Canoe

'My bark may be worse than my bite, but I've got a whine that will drive you up a wall!'

Licensed Therapist

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

Bird feeding chick that is nesting in a knight's helmet

Caveman's dog with head outside car window.

"There's really not much to obedience school. Just listen up and do what they say."

"Well, here's the problem. You been takin' the hair ball pills and givin' the Viagra to the cats."

'I know he doesn't like this house, but he'll just have to get used to it.'

Mixed Doubles.

"Snow White! It's the dancing, singing woodland creatures wondering if you want to go down the pub."

'Good evening! The debate over animal experiments continues...'

"I'm beginning to think that buy one, get one free is not always a good thing."

Bill and Lester have a 'Hay Day'.

'Don't be embarrassed by your anti-barking collar, implanted tracking chip, and GPS device. Just think of them as fashion accessories.'

Self-Isolating. Do Not Disturb (Except For Food).

Lamb Noise.

"Just when you're about to lose faith in humanity, you see Shakespeare in the Park."

"Don't even think about it."

I'm beginning to regret buying that Roomba.

"Who's a good boy? You're a good boy."

Christmas Pets

"Your love gives me strength."

PET THEORIES

''I couldn't wait any longer.''

Chasebook

"Humans are strange."

"All you're doing is emboldening cats."

'I don't understand: I lick the plates clean, but Mistress still puts them in the dishwasher afterwards...'

'Technically, he's on a leash, so I say we let this one go.'

"And for dessert, I'd like the mice pudding."

Of course your master calls you 'Man's best friend'. As your attorney I advise you to get it in writing.

"I'm supposed to wake Jasper up at sunrise, but which pile of snow is he asleep under?"