Pet Food Tester Pillows

Pet Entertainers

Bad for you but to die for

It turns out they don't go together so well,

Harsh Mellows.

"Hmmm... low ash content. Smells like someone switched to canola oil... wait, is that tripe I smell?"

"Is Pinot Noir where you want to be?"

Dogs stealing cat food - Vice Squad orders 'Stay!'

"Now, in contrast to the last olive oil you tasted, this one is infused with sixty-five more dollars."

"Your meal sounded nice."

And then in Italy. . . "But I really don't like bubblegum gelato."

Wine Tasting and Wine Guzzling

"I detect a subtle bouquet of money."

"For the first half hour, I was, like, really there. Enchanted. But I found the wild-quail confit so disappointing that not even the fig reduction on the poached pear could get me back."

Avocado Timeline

"They can put dogs in space, but they can't make decent tasting dog food."

Real coffee vs usual vending machine stuff

'Apparently, my wine-tasting computer liked the '86 Haut Brion a bit too much - it didn't leave any for us.'

'I'd recommend the white wine.'

'Why do my parents have to be professional chefs?!'

'...or, if you're watching your cholesterol, we also have thousand-year-old egg substitutes.'

'Here ya' go, sweetie. Our Key Lime Pie.'

Big Burgers.

"Invisible fences, voiced activated pet doors, automatic pet dispensers, how's an old dog supposed to keep up with all this new technology."

Chef swatting flies into a bowl in a sushi bar.

"Do you know our soup is world renowned?"

"I am listening to my body. My body says yuk!"

"Last chance — where’s the wet food?"

'Women cook to feed the soul...men cook to feed the ego.'

"Jeffrey eats everything, Mom, because no one has told him what he doesn't like."

"It's all good – but some of it is better."

-'God that looks disgusting.' -'You're telling me.'

'This sugar substitute is perfect except for one thing. It's salty.'

'You're lucky you can't read.'

"Robust, full-bodied bouquet with just a hint of bitter, mean-spirited despair."

"Sorry I'm late. It took me forever to find this place."