Pet Care Perfectionist T-Shirts

'...and now, Doctor, if you have satisfactorily disinfected your hands,...

"Relax, Dad... I'll put your toothbrush away when I'm done. I always do."

'A case of V/D prescription diet, please!'

"Point one: Your litterbox will be changed precisely every other day. Point two: These continued theatrics are not furthering your cause."

'I see! And, just how much will it cost if she is in season?'

"We can see through the troposphere, stratosphere, mesosphere and into all those distant stars up there in outer space... truly remarkable, huh, girl?"

Dog Walking Services

"A squirrel, impressive! I'm still chasing a stick."

"Well, here's the problem. You been takin' the hair ball pills and givin' the Viagra to the cats."

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

"Look, children are just pathetic substitutes for people who can't have pets."

'Guess who just graduated cum laude from Sunnydale Obedience School?'

Oh yeh? Well at least he doesn't get fleas.

"Cloning is an imperfect science."

"Man! That squirrel was jacked!"

Why Poodles Become Killers

'Daniel! How many times have I told you not to bury that in the back yard! I'm going to be late for work!'

'I don't understand: I lick the plates clean, but Mistress still puts them in the dishwasher afterwards...'

'Quick, I'll give you a piggyback ride home, otherwise, we'll get in trouble for being late...'

"What we have here is a severe case of over-growing."

'I'll have toast and he'll have a complete dog's breakfast.'

Dogs can dream too.

A Change of Scene.

"Sorry - my dog is at the vet. This one is a loaner."

'Who's next?'

Doris was determined to save money on cat parlour fees!

"I'm down here, Mona. That's your slipper."

"I think my parents are pretty old. They remember a time before 'clumping' cat litter."

Taking goldfish for a walk.

'Forget about building trust. Just give the dog a bath.'

'Here, take these... we're going to need a urine sample from him right now.'

My Bowl Is Empty.

Standard Poodle/Substandard Poodle

"Oh, no, no, no, no! Please, NOOO!"

"You're spoiling that dog again!"