Pet Care Hero T-Shirts

'As a guideline, if you charge half as much per hour as your attorney charges you, you'll earn the same gross income, if you work twice as many hours.'

"Well, it's a good thing cats game nine lives."/"Yeah, and each one seems to cost me a fortune."

Bathing the dog

"I'm beginning to think that buy one, get one free is not always a good thing."

Woman escapes with cats.

Cat in Tree.

"I just cleaned that glass! How can it already be covered in nose prints?!"

A Change of Scene.

'...and now, Doctor, if you have satisfactorily disinfected your hands,...

'Don't worry. I'm using carpet shampoo.'

"Relax, Dad... I'll put your toothbrush away when I'm done. I always do."

Litter.

Dog Show. He was this close to winning a ribbon until they subtracted points for his breath.

'You broke your wishbone. I'd suggest making a wish.'

'My practice is limited to small animals, Sir....'

Why dogs hate CPR.

"I think we feed to many vitamins to Tweety"

After Hours in the Pet Shop.

'You missed a spot.'

"Has anyone fed the goldfish?"

'I smell anal glands!'

"You owe your life to that dog. He pulled you to safety. Unfortunately, there's still no sign of the dog ??" or your arm."

'The two most depressing comments one can hear...'

-'The mighty warrior Vlaric surveyed the open plain...his muscled torso ready for battle...' -'And at his side his majestic hound Druce sat patiently waiting...'

Animal Hospital

'Here's my business card.'

"There he goes again! What on earth does he do with it all?!"

"My human majored in 'business' management."

"Here's one I spayed earlier"

"That's right, I was on death row at the pound, but they came and adopted me! I am forever grateful..."

"Nothing stinks like a wet dog."

'Emily? Where's my technician?'

'There goes Mr Figgins from number 42. He never misses a chance to walk his dog.'

"When was the last time you cleaned the goldfish bowl?"

"The living room aquarium? No, I have't bee near it."