Pet Bonus Recipient T-Shirts

'I guess it's better than no bonus at all.'

"I've decided to step down as CEO so I can spend more time with my money."

'Investment charts can be complicated, son, but that usually means, 'bonuses'.'

The Evolution of the Bonus

Raised by Dogs

'Thanks to the huge bonus, I find myself forced to admire you.'

"Just gotta wait 'till she wakes up."

Okay, start shouting them in for their annual bonuses.

"My boss had security escort me out of the office today. I'm worried this means I won't be getting a bonus."

"What a coincidence, that's my name, too!"

'Guess who made a bushel today?'

'But the good news is, I still get a big bonus.'

"At bonus time, just don't forget where you get your intellectual property."

'I chose here since heaven won't allow you to take your bonus and golden parachute with you.'

'Remember Nitro, keep the engine running and once we've bagged the bonus cheques you floor the peddle.'

"Give us a minute, honey."

'Oh dear. I seem to have put the decimal point in the wrong place again.'

"No Jenkins, that's NOT a sales graph - it's my salary increase."

'Tell me more about the obscene bonus package.'

"For future security questions, the name of your first pet should include a minimum of eight uppercase and lowercase letters, numbers and special characters."

'$800,000 per year? Is that with or without an incentive bonus?'

'Oh quit griping and be thankful we even got a bonus this year!'

"Will my bonus look big in this?"

"You've been vital to our great year. Your bonus is whatever you can carry out by midnight."

"Unlike the case for dogs, the people that cats own don't grow to look like them. I mean, seriously, what human could look as good as this?"

"Miss Sadie did remember several pets in her will."

'I'd like a job where I'm hated for having obscene amounts of money.'

'I always assumed you were a cat person!'

'My Christmas bonus.'

"Souls are a dime a dozen. The best I can give you is ten free dance lessons."

"If I don't get a bonus from my bank, I'll quit and flip burgers!"

"The government wants us to wear these bonus hazard suits."

CEO Incentives

"I got a bonus for the first time in years. Would it be selfish to spend it on myself instead of on Christmas gifts?"

'Before I announce the bonus schedulae for this fiscal year, let's pause and give thanks for our loyal ex-colleagues now serving with the S.E.C.'