Pet Adoption Aficionado T-Shirts

'I think it's past its sell-by date.'

For sale! Bulldog

"Pick me!"

"Cat box"

"As a friend, I pray you rest in peace. As a dog, I really want to dig you up."

"Okay, you both know the rules: no trash talk, no batting the other guy all over the house if he’s unconscious, watch the claws and nails..."

"For the girls—Kimberly, Caitlin, Lauren, Cindy, and Tracy. For the boys—Cameron, Christopher, Adam, Jeffrey, and Gregory."

Canine Companion

Welcome to the Team

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

Foster failure

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

"We're just going to have to face the fact that you're not a puppy anymore!"

"Oh, yeah, that's the spot... just stay there... hurt so good... a little harder—yes! You are my hero, no kidding, I freaking love y-oooh..."

" 'Grrr' is not a word."

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"

'That's not speaking, that's barking Try again'

Couple sitting in living room reading books while dog reads a book with a cat shaped cover.

"Did you get my tweet?"

"I don't know about you, but it always makes me feel kinda special."

'What was all that swerving at the cat walk?'

"He also barks, meows and makes noises like a hamster."

He acts all cool and feral until the can of food comes out. Jingle jingle jingle.

"I could catch a bicyclist, well maybe not a bicyclist, but I could catch a jogger, definitely."

'It's normal, don't worry, people on the street just love patting puppies...'

"Watch out, Simone's hangry - her stomach AND her throat are growling."

Love Conquers All

"He's already getting attached to you."

"Be kind"

Pets.

"Look. They say sit, you sit. They say roll over, you roll over. Where's the prob?"

'Other dogs howl at the moon, I've trained mine to play Bach.'

Author's Bio-diversity.

"The video of you eating my $700 John Varvatos got 300 'likes.'"

"If you can’t beat ’em, roll around in their decaying carcass."