Pessimistic Poet Pillows

Why Me? - Why Not?

Forlornaments: Tools to drain individual and team spirit

Arthur Schopenhauer

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

Untold Love Stories. The Shadow and Pollyanna. It's no use, Lamont, you know what evil lurks in the hearts of men and I believe there's good in everybody.

"Nobody listens to me complain quite like you do."

"Show me a man who's optimistic about the human race..."

Platitudes for the hopelessly realistic. When life gives you lemons, get a gift receipt.

The glass is half full. - '' - 'The glass is half empty' - '' - 'Gah!! No clean glasses!!' - '' -

"Today, in all aspects of life losses outnumbered gains."

'Satchel, life is like a can of tuna...'

"A pessimist thinks that we've already arrived."

"Half Empty. Half Empty. Half Empty-"

"Look on the dark side."

Tom's last day.

"I see fleeting moments of happiness in between extended periods of boredom and stress."

"Road construction used to bother me. But compared to all the craziness going on in the world, I'll take this any day."

The End is Near art gallery opening.

'What do you mean, you're having second thoughts...?'

'Barnhill from Marketing will present our economic projections.'

"Oh well - same shit, different day. . .!"

Lent is a real drag this year. - 'Why? What did you give up?' - 'Hope.' - 'I gave up chocolate. Guess what?1' - 'What?' - 'I've made my ideal weight! Yay!'

"Die alone"

'I feel better today too, but around here I've learned not to be too optimistic.'

Half Empty/Half Full/I'm Still On Vacation!!!

"What? You were expecting good news? Expectations are so-o-o-o passe."

Abstract art proves that things can be as bad as they look.

"Sometimes, on days like this, I feel like the world is conspiring to make me happy."

That's where we're different. I see the toilet bows half-full, and you see the toilet bowl half-empty.

'Would you say this glass is half empty or half full?'

Must you always be so negative?

'Your glass is half full!'

"If you're thinking of evolving, don't bother."

The Ekert Saga: '...A place where people are always unhappy no matter how well things are going? Ah! Got it...Go to Fenway Park in Boston.'

'Turned out nice again.'