Personality Analyzer Pillows

'Listen, Geoffrey ...I know you're a clinical psychologist, but I DON'T have A.D.D. ! You're just incredibly boring.'

'Sometimes she's like a wave, sometimes she's like a particle.'

"I'm too old to be incorrigible, and too young to be crusty. I'll have to be just plain offensive for a while."

"He gets easily abstracted."

"I have 25 patients in my counselling group...Mrs Sherman, Mr Martin, and Mr Martins 23 other personalities."

"She's really nice and I didn't want to hurt her feelings, so here we are."

"He'd make a wonderful main character for a short story, but I wouldn't put up with him for an entire novel."

"Right. Women adore him, men want to be like him, and YOU... well, you're hopeless. So, am I the ONLY one who sees through this guy?"

The glass is half full. - '' - 'The glass is half empty' - '' - 'Gah!! No clean glasses!!' - '' -

'Sheisse ... What ein dream!' - Freud

"You're either the olive or the Martini."

'I'm not mad! I'm fuming!'

If you were an iceberg...

Psychology 101

'I've been married 4 times...do you think my resistance is down?'

Some Friends From Work

"I'm overbearing, conceited and obsessed with status."

'Which one shall I get?'

Protests

"Would you consider yourself creamy or crunchy?"

I never realised that my personality had a 2 for 1 split.

Personality Test - No Result

'You can't get by on fluffiness forever!'

"I'm less judgmental now that I've failed at everything in life."

Kiss me quik dating service

"I'm very slow to anger, but then I'm very slow to do everything."

Types of people who live in my house

"You can try all you want, but being smooth is just something you're born with."

'I would definitely say I'm a 'type A' personality.'

Panache shoots down Charisma.

"I've always felt I was a Taurus trapped in a Libra's body."

'It seems that he was too optimistic. His glass of water wasn't half full. Obviously, it was completely empty.'

'I'm 50 percent lovable and 50 percent bitch. Don't push it.'

"Dude, loosen up!"