Performance Art T-Shirts

"Well, the tickets sure as hell weren't minimal."

"But, can you help me quit smoking?"

Judge about dancing lawyer: 'When you get to the second stanza of this song and dance, please approach the bench.'

Octopus on Keys.

Mr Astley's Theatre

Losing a loved one is never easy. The trick is to make it look easy.

Tight rope walker.

Nude conductor of Orchestra conducting 'The full Monte-verdi'

'You folks enjoying the big top?'

The circus diver.

'So, still won't talk eh?'

A policeman ending a puppet show

Lester crosses that very fine line separating cost accounting from performance art...

"There's nothing like a dame!"

Passed over at the Inaugural Poetry Audition

Interesting encounters in history.

"I sensed a fine balance between the misery on the stage and the misery in the audience."

'That would be your perfect job...paid to do nothing!'

Missing you.

Elephants performing in a circus

'Reminds me of how I balance your pay packet each week!'

'Oh, lord! This is going to take FOREVER!'

'..the sound of no hands clapping...'

"We have GOT to get a new bed. This soft mattress is killing me!"

Ramon was truly a polished performer...walking backwards up a spiral staircase, blindfolded and totally unassisted, while comparing private health insurance packages!"

Magic Accident

'Hello, I'm your understudy.'

Mime School - I will not talk in class.

"Try thinking of this as a totally immersive performance art installation."

'Oh, Harold...How can I face our family and friends knowing you're a crossdresser?!'

'Whoops. There goes one of my prostheses.'

'Oops, wrong sequence.'

'Malcolm here used to be a sword swallower.'

Comedy, Tragedy and News.

Interior Monologuist