Pearl Enthusiast Pillows

"I'm not happy."

"We're going out -- of course I'm wearing my pearls."

Birth of Darth Vader

We Talked More When You Weren't Rich

Pernalogist

"Gladys, look! My kids made me a card for Mother's Day!"

Ultrasound

'Go ahead and laugh, but I lose my keys less frequently than you do.'

'Half-baked beans, low fat variety' "Who says we have no taste?"

"Diamonds are so three billion years ago..."

'Well, Frobisher, it's taken a millennium, but thanks to our initial public stock offering, we've finally turned lead into gold.'

Disco Bunny.

'I want to finish with him, but I'll have to wait until he's made the final payment on my engagement ring.'

'Good morning pumpkin.' 'Good morning treasure.' A pile of treasure saying 'good morning' to a pumpkin

'It's in my belly-button if you must know!'

Jewellers - "If you really love your wife to be, then money should be no object."

"Next time you meet me dressed as a giant boy, it's going to cost you a pair of diamond earrings."

"Jewelry store, visit our ATM."

You just keep giving.

Found pearls! No way I'm leaving. . . Amelia.

How oysters get engaged.

Investor alternates between hating and loving gold, depending on the stock market's performance.

"You know what, let's go with the pearl earring."

'To tell you the truth, you've ruined the gold market, Mr Midas!'

'How do I qualify for the 'Preferred Customer Discount' you're advertising?' 'Do you have a pulse?'

Ladies who lunch.

'As you can see, we've been recapitalized.'

"You haven't left much room for sun tan lotion"

"I never expected you to pay through the nose."

'Hey, I've found another one! Let's go and play marbles...'

"Let's get to work, there's gold in them there hills."

Mom, I gotta hang up. Jill's about to find the diamond I hid under the bacon she always refuses to eat!

'May I have my allowance in gold bullion?'

'Well in your price range, all you can afford is the box...'

"I think he had the idea he was looking at costume jewelry."