Peanut Butter Fan Pillows

Does my touch make your knees turn to Jelly? No. The best I can tell you is that it makes my elbows turn to peanut butter.

Circa 1928, The Reese's Candy laboratory.

"He's not talking yet, but sometimes we give him peanut butter to make it look like he is."

'The school bus drove off without me. The driver said she couldn't allow one more peanut butter sandwich on her bus.'

'Look at that! Peanuts!'

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

Non-Humble Pie.

'He can't be all bad if he still likes peanut butter.'

'Can I have some of your peanut butter and jelly sandwich? All my mom ever gives me is cake.'

"And it shall be called peanut butter. And it shall appear as if perishable or in need of refrigeration but in truth it shall remain shelf-stable for months, though the oil may separate and require stirring. And there shall be a crunchy variety and there shall be a smooth variety. And . . ."

"If I have this peanut in my pocket, it means I must have buried my keys!"

Lunch Meet

Jelly I.V.

"The nurse thinks she's sneaky, but I know my meds are in the peanut butter."

'I'd like something with a high amount of vegetable protein, a bit of glucose or dextroe for energy, and some fiber.' 'One peanut butter and jelly on toast.'

'This feeling of passion I have for you ...'

Mixed Nuts (but mostly peanuts)

"I don't really think you're cut out for this job..."

"Mom, Eugene picked all the peanuts off the pizza!"

"I hab peenut buffer stok to woof of my mout!"

"No religious nuts!"

"That's your separation anxiety? When the oil separates in your all-natural peanut butter?"

"What happened to my piece of cake?"

For the Love of Peanut Butter

"When you're done cyberattacking, your PB&J, with crustd cut off, is waiting."

Food Science Lab. There's jealousy among the peanut butter molecules. "Smooth" does out all the time and "chunky" can't get a date.

"It's like as soon as we got married the man became so stupid we can't even remember how to slap some peanut butter on a cracker."

"He's not talking yet, but sometimes we give him peanut butter to make it look like he is."

"Keep it open."

Peanut Butter and Jam Attack,

'I think we're in luck. This judge likes 'nut' cases.'

"I'd trade, but peanut butter sticks to my tongue stud."

'I couldn't put it down... I had peanut butter on my hands.'

'More bad news from the lab. You're allergic to peanuts.'

'I like making pastry. It gets your hands clean.'