Peaceful Partier Gifts

"See? I told you it would be more fun settling our differences over a few drinks."

'Your neighbor wanted me to break up a wild party, but actually, I find this a congenial affair,'

"Too crowded. Let's go."

The International and May Day Terrorism

Arms race - USA and Russia.

"Why can't you ever relax at parties?"

"God help us, it's that guy."

Neutral Man.

'Non-alcohol beer, unsalted potato chips and tofu hot dogs? Why did you accept a party invitation from a cardiologist?'

"Yeah? Well, tell him that in this company Gandhi-like resistance wouldn't have worked for Gandhi, either."

Poll: The World Will End With: Nuclear War, Global Warming, Assault Weapons.

Peace Negotiator now available for Weddings, Funerals, Christenings, Barmitzvah

Lovebird and the Song Birds

"You've found the formula for eternal world peace that makes all armies superfluous? Sorry, I've got to shoot you."

'We'd just like to get away from partisan politics for a while...'

"It's O.K., I've got his car keys."

"Me: I never get invited to anything Also me: Sorry, I'm so tired, think I'll stay in."

A monk watches TV in his zen garden.

'It was the only white thing I had.'

'We would like you to accompany us to the station, sir!'

Nerds night out: 'Dibs on Designated Driver.'

'Have a tequila - have a tequila!'

'Smart' missiles spell out the message.

Labour Protests.

"Hey, gang! Before this blast gets under way, would you all please stand for Whitney Houston's rendition of our national anthem?"

Let me forget

"It's Friday, Steve - have a donut!"

'Sergeant! Wake up the lazer guided slaughter-bot. We have a mission for him.'; Reply - 'But he looks so peaceful, Sir.'

The Zen of Regulation

Danaelect: 'There wouldn't be so many problems if everyone spoke the same language, so I'm creating one.'

A Nation of Peace

'Well, Dan, all of your scratching makes sense now: You have hippies.'

Horror Stories by the Base campfire.

"He's the life and body of the party"

'Attaining harmony with the universe is a gradual process. You need to start with a cease-fire.'