Paying Fine Prints

Artist's Equipment Comes To Life

'Half-time, full-time - It's gone into penalties, woman!'

'I do the work of three men...how about giving one of us a decent salary?'

Painter's Duel.

'Personally, I don't question these things. My snout period will simply end when it ends.'

'Sorry, but I think your Mondrian tattoo was a mistake.'

J. M. W. Turner

Landscape Artists

How Art Works.

Masterpiece?

An artist blows smoke that forms into a cloud which rains onto his canvas.

'Did you drop this £20 note, Sir?' 'Ooh, YES!' 'That will be a £50 fine.'

"... $3 million, I have $3 million. Can I get $4 million? Yes, $4 million ..."

'Sorry, I'm married to that one.'

Jackson Pollock's early paint-by-numbers period.

"Yeah, I know why you pulled me over. But, c'mon. I'm down to half a pack a day and I'm tryin' to quit."

"Look,we'll settle this on penalties, not an American style shoot out."

Book from the Library of Alexandria. Woman says: 'Have you seen how overdue this book is?'

A visit to the marionette theatre in Milan.

Copycat.

'Uh-oh. That's the 'special' whistle. ... This is going to be a major penalty.'

'Dang. I cut my ear off and I have no idea where my styptic pencil is.'

"If it makes you feel any better, I'm pretty sure you're single-handedly keeping the U.S. postal service in business."

Pavement artist.

Old Rope

'Sir has made the most discerning choice to wash it down with Drain Glug.'

The Infant Prodigy - Experiencing The Arts

"£100 spot fine...er, because we don't like your face."

Sculpting a Woman's Backside

Time Smoking a Picture.

But the brochures says breakfast in bed! Yes, only if you carry your bed down to the dining room!