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"He was much more effective in the field."

Support group for sheep.

"You call this a constitution?"

Dogma

"I certainly trust this meal is kosher."

"I've heard great things about your church. Thought I would visit and say keep up the good work."

'It's good to see you, Mr. McWit, but you do realize that today is neither Christmas or Easter?'

"Your shepherd, Louie, has retired. I'm Mr. Smathers. I will be your grazing-resource coördinator and flock welfare-and-security manager."

'Well, there go all MY plans....'

The ten ammendments

Vicar wearing sunglasses.

'Please take your receipt!'

"Since we now have a leaking roof problem, it might be a good time to schedule baptisms."

Paul was Generally Considered the Cutest Apostle

'What are you giving up for Lent this year?' - 'Anchovies.' - 'I thought you hated anchovies?' - 'I do. Care for a cookie instead?' - 'Lent is supposed to be about challenge and sacrifice!' - 'Play to win, Baby!'

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

Church restrooms

Moses' first encounter with the burning bush didn't go well.

Finger puppets in church.

'Turn the other cheek, reverend.'

A woman in prayer

The Vatican's undercover mission to Antarctica, and some endangered penguins.

"I was kind of hoping just to tell them what they want to hear...."

"Dearly beloved, and others..."

'But, apart from the pews, the sermon, the hymns, the coffee and, 'all that praying', you'd come again?'

Minister Starts at a New Church

"...I'll send you for an amniocentesis."

Om and Ommer

Nativity - The sitcom

'When I asked for your favourite Saint, I didn't think of someone like Michael Ballack, son.'

"This wandering in the desert for forty years thing -- It IS allegorical, isn't it?"

When The Seven Deadly Sins Come Knocking.

'So long as he doesn't preach what he practices.'

"And the Lord he sayeth 'doest thou thinkest I knoweth not who sniggereth at the back there?'"

"I'm charging you with texting and driving."