Party Planning Mishap T-Shirts

"It looked better on pinterest."

Tartine

Clyde thought “Atomic Sparklers” was just an ad gimmick

"Oh, no - Karen baked a cake so dense that not even light can escape."

Beach con-man.

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

'Just how big of a tailgate party are you expecting to have?'

Peephole in a pile of presents (colour).

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

'He made an excellent jelly.'

Martha Stewart Takes Over The Universe

'Life is all attitude: 45 seconds of enjoying it...45,000 hours of regretting it...'

That party went well.

'I always cry at weddings!'

"Of course I'm dressed like a cheap w***e! It's Halloween! Duhh!"

"The eggnog fountain is a bad idea."

'You're hopeful - worrying about what underwear to wear for the office party!'

Cut out and keep your own DJ.

Wedding bouquet spring loaded shoes.

"Great news, I've booked you two stag nights, a hen party and fourteen solemn thanksgiving services for members of the theatrical profession"

'Okay, so you were right; maybe figuring 13 bottles of wine per person was a little too much.'

A car towing a yacht full of people partying down a rural road.

Christmas Drinks 'n' Nibbles System

"When Harold first said he identified as a balloon animal I thought it was just a phase, but here we are fifteen years later and it seems to be working."

Person carrying balloons and plants.

Guess what! I'm doing the plants for a sweet 16 party. "Doing?" Tree's Trees Nursery. I'm forcing 2,000 peach tulips, 500 peach irises and a bank of peach azaleas. Peachy, but�Sale. If Twig hears about it, she'll want her own big fat sweet 16. Mum's the word. Mums are cheesy. I much prefer heirloom roses.

"We used to entertain a great deal."

'You're texting? Wait--'

Vegetarian Birthdays.

Great doing business with you. I look forward to next year.

Cupcake jumps out of cake.

Annual 'See You In The Spring' Hibernation Party.

Pinata Zombies

"Two questions: What time are the guests arriving, and do you still want me to slice the pepperoni?"

"Do that again, but cuter."