Party Pessimist T-Shirts

"Omigod. The entire axis of boring is in there."

Surprise

Arthur Schopenhauer

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

The glass is half full. - '' - 'The glass is half empty' - '' - 'Gah!! No clean glasses!!' - '' -

"Today, in all aspects of life losses outnumbered gains."

"A pessimist thinks that we've already arrived."

"Half Empty. Half Empty. Half Empty-"

"Look on the dark side."

"If, indeed, there is a reason for all this, than that's so much worse."

Tom's last day.

The End is Near art gallery opening.

"I see fleeting moments of happiness in between extended periods of boredom and stress."

"Oh well - same shit, different day. . .!"

Lent is a real drag this year. - 'Why? What did you give up?' - 'Hope.' - 'I gave up chocolate. Guess what?1' - 'What?' - 'I've made my ideal weight! Yay!'

"A glimmer of hope is fine, Hendricks, but anything more than that will lead to massive disappointment."

"Die alone"

Follow England mate, they're always crap!

'I feel better today too, but around here I've learned not to be too optimistic.'

A Stray Curmudgeon in a Field of Perennial Optimists.

Half Empty/Half Full/I'm Still On Vacation!!!

Things can only get worse...

'Have you seen the financial pages?' - 'Yes, things are going to get a lot worse before the get worse.'

Whinge drinkers: 'Music is too loud as usual', 'You can never get a seat'.

"What? You were expecting good news? Expectations are so-o-o-o passe."

'Would you say this glass is half empty or half full?'

Must you always be so negative?

'Your glass is half full!'

Have A Nietzsche Day

"Actually, it was an excellent year for bottom feeders."

This will be a banner day for you!

"The scariest part is knowing that someday something'll come along that will make us go, 'Even the spider mutants weren't this bad.' "