Partner With A Pet Mugs

'Have you seen little Spotty?'

'With 73 dog obedience books read between us, I think we must consider defeat.'

"What's wrong, boy? Is Timmy stuck in the well? Are zombies at your doggy door? A fire? Squirrels are holding your bone hostage? My Spotify stock just tanked?..." "He thinks he's real funny."

Thanks to her cat-cam, Cheryl was able to keep her furniture from being shredded while she was at work.

"When I first arrived, Young Master was always with me and Old Master didn't want anything to do with me, nor it's the opposite: Go figure..."

Owner Looks Like Poodle.

"You can stop pulling, you knucklehead—I took your leash off ten minutes ago."

'Don't be embarrassed by your anti-barking collar, implanted tracking chip, and GPS device. Just think of them as fashion accessories.'

Collies Without Borders

''I couldn't wait any longer.''

Snooze buttons for cat owners

Pet Entertainers

'Marm doesn't understand, 'I've got it, I've got it'.'

"Odd, since neither of us overfeeds her by even the smallest amount."

"Cat park"

"Let me know if you smell any large-mouth bass."

"It's nice to be wanted."

"I'm no expert but I think global worming would be a good thing."

"I'm OK. But I think the dog wants to go out."

"The first thing we have to do is get you up there."

'Dog Show' 'Worst breath winner'

'They used to call me 'Fluffy', but it's been 'Lucky' ever since I survived the spin cycle.'

If your dog is fat, you're not getting enough exercise.

'I should have listened to my Mum, she always said, 'Never underestimate how fast a zebra can run'.'

Chasebook for Dogs

His master's voice

'Well, would ya look at this, Martha? The dog's stealin' our cable. I told you this breed can't be trusted.'

'What do you say we become vegetarians?'

'She's killing me with kindness!'

Cat watching plug sockets.

'There are 10 great things about living with a senior dog. We're already potty trained, and we don't jump around and chew your stuff.' og proceeds to lie down saying 'The other reasons will come to me after my nap.'

Dog on Cat.

"Good lord! Four of my dearest Facebook friends died last week!"

'The waitress gave us a weird look. On the way back, I'd better drive and you can stick your head out the window.'

Cat Chores