Parlor Prankster Mugs

"Can you perform a large-scale miracle on a parlor trick budget?"

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

"It's a memo from the legal department reminding us to (heh-heh), 'keep our noses clean'."

Gracie goes to get cookies for Santa, but Papi has eaten them all.

Sounds that various toys make when they are vacuumed up.

Pinocchio's nose used by cat as a scratching post

A spider is afraid of another spider's mask.

A cow poos down a hole.'UH-OH!'

Boy rolled into a snowball

'He barks when he sees the boss coming.'

Revenge of the Jelly Mother.

'Hello, Acme signs? This is the Berger & Coles Law Office...'

'Take two tootsie rolls and call me in the morning.'

Boy makes snowman around a lamp post.

"You see, it's perfectly safe to tease him..."

What do you mean, "Did I try anything funny?"

Resourceful toddler

"If they want a snowball fight, then I'll give them one."

Tamagotchi paralysis.

'There! See that? Brad just happens to morph into some kind of hideous amphibian just as he's about to putt? Now tell me she's not cheating!'

Scary stuff

"If you think you made a stink pulling the fruit, try pulling His finger."

Aaannd … Peekaboo!

Dr, Wagner's dental floss spider web made going to the dentist much more appealing to kids,

'I could eat you.'

"Where's Waldo? Where's Waldo? Peek-a-boo! There he is!"

'I did it all from memory.'

Ooooh! Someone got a carrot job! Someone got a carrot job!

"Ok, I found a secure line."

'Hi, this is Batman. You've reached the Batcave. I'm not in right now but as soon as I return I'll call you bat.'

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

'I found what was making those funny noises.'

Teddy Time Bears

'Excuse me, I'm going to talk on the cellphone while pretending you're not here.'