Parent-child Relationship Fanatic Pillows

"Damn it, agree to whatever she demands. No matter what it takes, I want my mommy."

"Your momma lied to you, boy."

First Steps

Boy on father's knee

"Sorry I'm late with my grades. I was busy removing the 'Honor Roll' bumper sticker from the car."

"It's another e-mail from your folks. You know, this would be a whole lot easier if you'd just tell them about the Web."

Young Godzilla.

"Next to my two years in the Marines, you're the best thing I've ever done."

'Do you think Mum and Dad are trying to keep an eye on us, by enroling on the same university course as us, Colin?'

'Mom, would you have married Dad if you had seen him in high definition first?'

"My mom can be a little over-protective ... "

'Don't try so hard . . . I want a dad, not a homey!. . .'

'Oh, don't even think about living life vicariously through me!'

"Stickers, fairy tattoos, a coloring book ... but no, Mom, I'm not seeing any stretch-mark cream in the goody bag."

'Dad, when do I stop being a wholly owned susidiary of you and Mom?'

"My mom still makes all my clothes by hand."

"Jack and Nina's concern grew when their son, James, confided in them that his imaginary friend was, in fact, a short-tempered snapping turtle."

'I've got to have a talk with my mother. She thinks the stork brought me.'

"My four-year-old son usually helps me, but he's at his grandparents' home."

"I don't see why I have to learn this stuff! It's knowledge I'll never need! As long as you're here to translate for me."

'A cow is called 'productive livestock' because it gives milk. Parents are productive livestock, too, because they give pocket money.'

"I told mom I won't answer her calls in case a scammer got her number."

'I see by your resume that you are my son. If this checks out, the job is yours.'

Motherhood and Apple Pie.

"I only get them to please my dad."

'You've got a new Christmas sweater!'

"That is not my pee I'm smelling."

'How many times do I have to tell you? Go and wash your trunk before dinner!'

"I'm spending the day with my aging parents."

"Your father's here. Better stop sucking your thumb."

The First Take Your Child To Work Day.

A father and his daughter anxiously prepare for her first date.

Mothers day

I'm going upstairs! Me too. I hate mom's book group. Talk about annoying chat rooms!

"Rayna, you wanna go on a date?"