Painting Poser T-Shirts

Lady mimics The Scream.

'Say low-cholesterol dairy-free alternative to cheese!'

"It's the poor artist who blames his crayons."

'You called me out of the blue... Cobalt, ultramarine, prussian, cerulean or phthalocyanine?'

'Are you done yet?'

Vincent Van Goth.

"O.K., now I need a few shots of you looking concerned about the planet."

Man and Woman suck in their stomachs in order to impress.

"Remember when they just used to write the train numbers down?"

"Big deal! My digital picture frame can hold a thousand pictures!"

"I thought this was the Vermeer tour."

Ceiling Paint

"It's almost as if you can get lost in it, Timmy. Timmy?"

Bird in sunglasses balancing on a stick.

"He had help. There were architecture specialists, costume specialists, angel specialists..."

'Excuse me, would you mind...?'

Which came first - the chicken or the egotist?

Fin (The end).

"I'm going to throw this contract out the window, hargraves. Bring it back to me and make sure someone's signature is on it."

Surgery.

Gustav Klimt

Artist's model for a painting of Hamlet turns up to the studio with a black eye

Painting and Decorating

'I started out as a sculptor, but I kept hitting my thumb.'

Selfie

"I know Beth from the days when 'Christina's World' was up where the Klimt is now."

Baldo and Cruz try to look good as women in bikinis walk by."

Schrodinger's cow

The Art Critic

Nude model looking at her portrait.

Caveman painting by numbers.

'Its like Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen had never been born'