Pain Enthusiast Mugs

'This won't hurt, honest.'

A man hugs a heart-shaped cactus

'I'm wrapping it tightly to keep the ankle from swelling.'

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'It's a beautiful lighthouse. However, hauling the batteries up the stairs has taken its toll on my back.'

"I love this comedy. What's it called?"

St John's ambulance member "I prefer rugby myself, more blood shed"

'I've got an appointment with Mr. Payne.' - 'He'll see you now.' - 'Okay, take a deep br-' - 'Gah!' - 'Great, now turn ov-' - 'Argh!' - 'And a final tw-' - 'Mummy!' - '*Sob*' - 'Okay, all done.' - 'Did you, by any chance...' - '...hear you crying...'

'Very funny!'

"You've been traded to the Red Sox for an outfielder with a broken arm."

'I think this fishing injury is more serious than you're letting on!'

"I don't prescribe opioids, but feel free to grab a CBD-laced lollipop on your way out."

"Of course, I would suggest a shot of novacaine."

"I think he stood on a nettle."

'I have stomach cramps.' - 'Oh.' - 'It feels like a cat raking its claws down the inside of my stomach.' - 'Oh.' - 'Raking in a good way or a bad way?' -

"Where does it hurt?"

'This is going to be a level three.'

"I'd kill for 500 milligrams of naproxen."

'Does it hurt when I do this...?'

"Does your tooth still hurt?"

Dentist.

'I suggest you refrain from reaching into your untamed bird's cage in the future.'

'OW! OW! OW! OW!' 'Are you sure you're cut out for the old fight game?'

'This is going to be a level three.'

'You can say, 'I tore a ligament' or 'I blew out my knee.' But in this league you never, ever say, 'I got a boo-boo.''

The Chiropractor - 'I've been looking forward to this all week!'

"It would be easier to tell you what doesn't hurt."

Masochists' Investment Club - today's topic: 'no pain, no gain'.

Thousands Of Casts

'Back pain? The beef stew is just laced with analgesics.'

"With 1 being the lowest, and 10 being the highest, could you rate the pain of your headache?"