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"I never have time to read but if I did these are the books I'd read."

'I have a case of...oh, heck. What's that called?'

Sorry I've got Writer's Block.

Wind-up Writer

A book reviewer reads between the margins.

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

"According to mom the answers are all in this book!" "Too bad there's no pictures at which to look!"

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

"I'm in a catch-23 situation."

"That's five votes for In The Midst of Winter....three votes for The Hollow Ground....and, again, one vote for Moby-Dick."

Next Time-Portal 5 Miles...

'Okay, let the minutes show we're not absconding with the money until the economy improves...'

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

Three work boxes: 'IN...LIMBO...OUT': 'I think I've found your bottleneck.'

"Today we'll examine that age old question of robot accomplishment: programming or processor?"

Thinking and thinking backwards.

How do you fell about buying your own health insurance?

"It makes me happy that you took time to read the newspaper today."

Time, Temp, Today's Neutrino Mass

"I like office work, it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours!"

'It's a real conundrum. Not sure if I should open it, or beat it.'

"Is there a God?"

Are you aware? The Higgs Boson was thought to exist even through no one had seen it!

'The hippiest dryads were often farouche.'

Doo inc..can and no can.

'Turn your thinking cap around, Robert.'

"Apparently, over two-thirds of the Earth's surface is covered with water!"

Desk bins: Pretend it's not here, Hope it goes away, Delegate it.

Answers to last week's brain-teasers

"It looks as if Bodecker's project has gotten completely out of hand."

'That's from the last year the data was available.'

"I'm basically happy but I'd like a most cost-effective personality."

Document Filing in the Post-Literate Era.

'No, I'm not into astronomy. That telescope is for you to see your new parking spot.'