Overprotective Aficionados Gifts

"Personally, I wouldn't have a problem with a nanny state."

No Immediate Danger

Mom, I think you're carrying us too much.

"I wouldn't take the name 'dog strangling vine' literally."

Personnel: 'I promised Mom I'd call her when I got here safely - do you mind?'

"You mentioned separation anxiety. Don't worry, she'll be all right."

"My mom can be a little over-protective ... "

'Which end's the shallow end?'

"Daddy, you're not going to give us a sermon on responsible behavior, are you?"

'Medical researchers discovered that the leading cause of death by aging is due to birthdays.'

Health and Safety Gone Mad - "It doesn't look safe, his face is totally exposed to danger."

"He wasn't specific. His last message just said, play it safe - whatever that means."

"They say you're only as old as your face."

My mom won't let me walk to school. I might get mugged. She won't let me play sports. I might get injured. West Fester High School. And she won't let me get onto the scales. Why not? It might hurt my self-esteem.

'For cryin' out loud. All I said was I thought I heard a noise outside last night!'

'Darn it Mother! I'm not MISSING! I'm just working DOUBLES this month!'

Took a tiny nothing molehill and created this huge, amazing mountain

'Oh, Daddy's old gun?... I think he's planning on showing it to you. He always said, it was there in case I ever brought a boyfriend home.'

"You spoil that child!"

'The cows are home, the chickens at roost, your horse is in the barn, and I expect you home by 10 PM,'

'Daddy's still up - I can hear him unlocking the firearms cabinet.'

'Hi, son, it's the Momster again.'

"What's this? A note? Gracie must have dropped it."

'I don't care how much you paid for it! It's not staying in our bed!'

"I don't have the energy to argue. How 'bout we slip into something comfortably passive-aggressive?"

"Rayna, you wanna go on a date?"

"Dad, can I go to Rex's house to play on his swing?"

"This accountancy firm doesn't actually hold Parents' Evenings, but rest assured, your little Timmy is doing just fine."

'I suppose ageing speeds up because you are over the hill...'