Outlooks Gifts

"Staying true to our mission, even our security cameras have rose colored lenses."

"Say, when did you get so fluff?"

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

Airplane Mode.

'Tell your boss we represent an independent watchdog committee.'

"That shirt is so last year."

'Those viewers who disagree with our editorial on TV violence has better keep their big mouths shut!'

"Office of quality assurance"

Thanks to an elaborate system of mirrors, every employee at Vecon Industries had a window view.

"All I see is more trees."

"Sarah, get me my own billboard right across the way. I'd like an office with a nice view."

"My new year resolutions were to continue eating, drinking, smoking and gambling...and I've stuck to all of them!"

"The meaning of life is having a spectacular view."

"Where are the perineums?" "Aisle 3. Between the vaginas and the rectums."

"Life’s become pretty easy lately. Perhaps it’s time we shake things up by adding a dependent."

"If you can't see the sea I can recommend an optician in the High Street."

'But your advert said, Fantastic view.' - 'She's out right now.'

'...and this glorious cliff-top property has recently been reduced by fifty per-cent.'

Opposing viewpoint.

'Now that my wife has had laser eye surgery, she's insisting we move to someplace with a better view.'

"You see, I told you it was worth the climb! Your first 'bird's eye view'. . ."

Welcome to Exclamation Point: Scenic Rest Area.

"My cousin is lucky, he lives on the 14th floor. I'm sure he has a great view of the end of the world."

"We now begin to notice that very few major modern writers have had big hair."

"I have a comment but nowhere to send it."

"What I'll miss most is his indefatigable optimism."

"Look! Another non regulated bank!"

'For me, an experience just isn't real until it's been digitized.'

An hour's free consultation...

'Of course it's more than we can afford - you want us to lose our image in the neighbourhood?'

Real estate agent showing observatory: 'You were looking for something with a view?'

'What a beautiful balcony! How's the view?'

'My parents went to the crocodile petting zoo and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.'

"No, I'm not wearing a black sweater. My black cat sheds a lot."

The end is near! Wacko. The end is far!