Outdoor Royalty T-Shirts

'I bought the biggest tent on the market. It's a man thing.'

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

"It's not a party until someone gets plowed."

'You can just forget about the cake.'

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

"I need a little more drama like a ten part mini-series."

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

The Grasshopper's Feast: A Prophetic Vision

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

'How about a game of cards?'

King George I

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Dead Cat Crown Jewels

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

TV jester.

"Doesn't seem like 6 hours on the couch, but you can't argue with a lethargy tracker."

'The Burrito King.'

Birds of the Pacific Northwest: Belted Kingfisher

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

'This vacation, let's go on something OTHER than a power trip.'

Czarcasm

'You've made a powerful enemy'

"She wishes to range free!"

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

"With all due respect, Sire, the Pizza King sends his kindest regards."

'Any wilderness skills besides making smores?'

"'Conquer Spain'? 'Balance the budget'? 'Reform the justice system'? -- You call this a honey-do list?"

'Well, nobody can say you haven't grown in office.'

Princess Anne

'The King of what?'