Outdoor Cookout Enthusiast Gifts

What if they held a chili cookoff, & nobody came!

"He can't decide which one he likes best. . .His leaf blower, his weed wacker, or his metal detector."

"Ahhh... close enough."

"I can't believe how great my life is now: We used to live in an apartment, but now, I have my own garden..."

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

Barbequer wears apron with 'Beer in -beer out' slogan.

Frank moonlights as a Grill Sergeant.

On August 14, 2011 at app. 2:00 p, Derek Winslow made scientific history by converting an item of the animal kingdom into an item of the plant kingdom.

'My feet are killing me.'

'Harold, when was the last time you cleaned the pool?!'

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

On my list of outdoor pursuits I put skinny dipping way ahead of this.

Allotment

'Just how big of a tailgate party are you expecting to have?'

Bring your own inflatable.

would you like it with extra botulism and a touch of salmonella?

Fly Fishing

Dog's kite's tail is wagging.

'I used to do that, but it just grows again.'

"It's such a lovely day!"

I hate deer! What do you have to repel them? They're awful. I've got fences. Sprays. Decoys. Tree's Tree Nursery. I'll takes these. Anything to get rid of the varmints. Ring him up, Twig. I don't know why you are so down on deer. They've been very good to you! Anti-deer.

I have an idea - Let's sit around the campfire and watch scary movies on our iPads!

Fishing sign.

'More bubbles!'

"You realize there’s probably an app for all this?!"

"I've just barbecued my head again."

When the world is Mud-luscious - e.e. cummings

The Brothers Grime

'Camping is nature's way of promoting B&Bs.'

"If I'd known we'd be this long wandering the wilderness I would never have worn these heels."

"Sometimes I like to come here by myself and contemplate ... or just scream about you."

'Hey - my dad promised that I'd get a gun.'

"Off my back and out of the sack. Let's unpack and have a snack!"

"Oh, honey, look! Just under that candy bar wrapper, next to the empty Bud Light can and to the left of the plastic bag... a salamander!"