Opportunistic Philanthropist Gifts

Take Away Wedding Cake 50p.

"HR-bill 9495. Cutting down non-profits."

Rich man vomiting euros to a beggar.

"Gee, thanks pal."

"When I grow up, I want to go into medicine and help people who can pay out of pocket."

"I'm in nonprofit work for the money."

"He says he wants to see the actual brick he donated."

"My wish is simple—to give something back to the community."

'The best grants lie that-a-ways, Ma'am.'

Hypocrisy about poverty

"Thank you, and may the I.R.S. accept all your deductions."

"Tia Carmen, if times are tough, how come you're giving money away?"

Inflation Is Up, Interest Rates Are Going Up. . . I'm Asking You To UP Your Donation.

"My Aunt Agatha – feminist, civil rights activist, philanthropist, sound engineer for 'Cheap Trick at Budokan.'"

Please Give

"I'll match donations when you match my tax payments."

The nonprofit dog fight.

"Look! It's the Montgomerys from the breast-cancer walk."

'For donating half my property to the poor, I'll get the 'Unselfish Millionaire of the Year' medal and a supporting receipt for my allowable expenses!'

'Sorry - I only donate big.'

The scales between gluttony and hunger

"My company sells military goods and information to unsavory characters around the world, and donates 100% of our profits to local charities!"

'I'd like to think they contribute because it's the right thing to do, but I'm not above a short sermon on tax deductibility.'

"What are we doing wrong?"

Miss Jellyby

"I got my first paycheck, and now I understand why our organization is classified as a nonprofit."

"When we said to be creative with your grant proposal presentation, this is not what was meant."

'Your very generous charitable contribution shows up as this very slight blip right here.'

'Can't you stop being charitable, we are on vacation.'

"It's that Silicon Valley foundation - they want to know if we'll match our grandson's $100 million donation."

Appeals

John Ruskin

'So then the alien stepped out of the UFO and said that he was a fundraiser from another planet, which was quite novel, I thought.'

'Let me introduce my biggest supporter, a real whale of a guy, a huge fan..'

Nelson Mandela