Opera Agent T-Shirts

'Sorry, no roles for you yet, Madam Caterpillar,'

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

Tut and Carmen.

'So you want an advance on your writer's block?'

Papageno from The Magic Flute

1599: Shakespeare's Agent knew what the public wanted

'The C minus was sufficient. I didn't need the advice against hiring a literary agent.'

Daughters on the beach

'Look - a starfish, its manager, its agent, its minders, its significant other, its make-up artist, its personal trainer, its secretary, its astrologer, its feng shui consultant...'

"Your hunch was right, Officer Garcia. We'll need a good editor to clean up this manuscript and bring his unfinished novel to a satisfying conclusion."

"Have you read any of Shakespeare's plays?"

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

'I have a best selling novel on the tip of my tongue...'

Modern Major General

"I'm sorry, we're looking for the voice of a spunky animated turnip and your reading is more fruit than vegetable if you understand what I mean."

Reginald Bunthorne

'Here's something that should suit your wooden acting style. How do you fancy playing the lead in Pinocchio?'

Falstaff

'She sounds like your mother when you told her that you were going to marry me.'

Senta jumps into the sea

Cafe Momus from La Boheme

'As a famous writer, could you do something to help jumpstart my career?'

Mendelssohn Finds His Inspiration

"No—You're thinking dog years—Editor years are twice as many."

Frederic Chopin

"What your memoir really needs is an addiction."

"Oh, this? Crazy story..."

Your resume begins Once Upon A Time...I like that!

Fourth Tableau of Das Rheingold

"Moby Richard by Herman Melville" "Wonderful! Not sure about the title—let's discuss editor."

"If you saw a book with the title 'An American Speaks Out,' would you buy it?"

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

Tristan Und Isolde

"Those are the failed attempts at my first novel."

"Great news, I've booked you two stag nights, a hen party and fourteen solemn thanksgiving services for members of the theatrical profession"