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The Ebookmobile

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

'My reading comprehension is so-so, but I do make up for it with my highlighting skills.'

"Meet the scribe"

Accelerated reading. Slowpoke reading,

"I imagined the Library of Congress would be much bigger."

Little dog in Romance section in bookstore under sign: 'Puppy Love'

"My novel is not a doorstop!"

Paranormal A-Z...

"I give up. Where's the power button?"

Gen-Next Library

'Is that where you keep the banned books?'

"Not that I have the time, but I enjoy reading."

"Author does not do tricks."

Another Bigfoot sighting...

"Yep, I've read this chapter before."

The Lessons of VietnamThe Lessons of Iran and ContraThe Lessons of Iraq.

Computer games

"I just edited your Wikipedia entry." "Big whoop." "What a coincidence, that's what scientists have classified you as: Bigwhoop." "...The much grumpier, much louder, and much, much older second cousin of Bigfoot." "You lousy son of a..." "Wait... thank you. That's very flattering."

Myths and legends...

"The library rejected your request to ban all books on cats and squirrels. But, to be fair, it was no dumber than all the other book ban requests we get."

Kid to boy in library: 'Oh, we came at the busiest part of the day ... it's a reading frenzy.'

'Do you have any books on controlling little monsters?'

'I know it's overdue but I've been in Intensive Care.'

'Trouble is they always forget to return them...'

'Have you got the book 'After the end of the world'?'

Travelogue

'Neither a lender nor a borrower be.'

'You know, you can do this all online now.'

'My manuscript is available for download on the internet. I'll email the link to you.'

The lion statues in front of New York City Library are replaced with spies.