Onion Aficionados Pillows

'Do you have any last words? -- I'm going to smother you in onions.'

baby sweetcorn...

Careful, the plate's probably still hot.

"Bloody hell!"

"So is this war movie rated R, rated PG, or rated RPG?"

OFA. Onion Farmer of the Year. I told myself I wasn't going to cry ….

'Football...Beer...Popcorn...that is Bernie's Stimulus Package.'

This Year's Spa

Rap-scallions

Onion Tears

"Let's see, we bought the giant pop corn, tow giant sodas, and a big box of candy. . . we were lucky the megaplex's loan department was open!"

'I just got the medium popcorn this time.'

Cinemuck

Acme Foods. Research and Development. Then it's an "no" on the Mexican Jumping Bean Dip?

'Now forget that I'm your boss and the CEO. How does my new product idea, Just the Lees, taste?'

"So, how's your scary movie?"

'Welcome home, Dear. Your dinner is in the popcorn bowl.'

'I need enough for popcorn and a movie.'

'That chap really knows his onions!'

Repletion.

'Popcorn? Sure. Would you like huge, mega, super-duper huge or gigundazillion multi multi really insanely huge?'

"Right-ho, Jeeves!"

"This oughtta be good...my lawyer is about to read my Will. I left everything to my cat Binky!"

"Should we try that new place in the corner?"

'Ha ha, you're covered in Cinemuck!'

"One coping mechanism I suggest to deal with uncertain times is to eat as much as you can, gain a lot of weight, and then go have a nap for six months or so."

'When I found iout you are what you eat, well, I'm nuts!'

It wasn't until years later that anyone would think to pop it.

'What, no onion rings?'

'Do you mind if I hold your hand, before it gets all buttery.'

'Man, this guy's killing me!'

"Oh yeah...she wants me."

Mother making popcorn string whilst her child eats the other end.

Reserve Ants

"Hold on. I'll buzz you in."