Old Testament Thinker Pillows

"'A land of milk and honey'? - But I'm on a DIET!"

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

'The Lord spake to Moses? You mean voice mail?'

'Yes, all at once!'

"How was I supposed to know that the apple was a controlled substance?"

"We've been wandering in the desert for forty years. But he's a man—would he ever ask directions?"

'Hello Colin, I'm Arthur, any idea what all the fuss is about?'

Ezekiel and his Dog: "Have you been in the valley of dry bones again?"

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

'God's forgiveness of sins ... is that like a spiritual bailout program?'

Christian and Born again Christian...

"Seminary didn't prepare me for this."

'Wow! It didn't take long to lose that new ark smell.'

"And almighty God said to Adam, 'Get a room already will ya!'" "Little known fact from the Book of Genesis."

Thomas Cranmer

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

Pastor's Bumper Sticker: Save the Congregation

''No other gods before me'? Oh - You're one of THOSE types.'

'When you pray, does God have call waiting?'

"Remember that it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of Heaven

'Get an afterlife!'

Horseshoes...Samson-style

'Let your people go? - after all the trouble I went to getting them full employment?'

'It's just like New-Time religion, but recognizes sin.'

"God's sent us some chocolates."

Joseph and his coat

"I don't see HIS name on it."

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

"I was kind of hoping just to tell them what they want to hear...."

'Do you ever wonder if we'll evolve into creationists?'