Office Rebels Pillows

"When I said 'any questions?' I was using only a figure of speech."

"We'd like to switch you from working under the radar to living off the grid."

Signing your opinions was the type of fearless, bold and honest act that would destroy this company. You're fired.

'This must be the day you're quiting. I saw your car parked in the boss's space.'

'I hate hump day!'

"Ha! Today we informed the boss about our rights!"

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

Do Not Resuscitate

"Rolled-up sleeves, no coat, loose tie...it's my casual confrontational look."

"Hiring someone to replace me and then expecting me to train him just doesn't sit well with me."

"Well, it's unanimous. Instead of going out of business quietly, with dignity and grace, we've decided to end things killer asteroid-style, taking as many of our competitors with us as possible!"

'You're developing a reputation as something of a cowboy, Henderson.'

"I think he's overreacting a little when it comes to controlling his employees."

Darren had lost his edge as a 'yes' man...

'Dude, touring with a punk rock band was fun, but what I'd really like to do is be CEO of a fortune 500 company.'

"Every now and then, I find myself in a room filled with people who are wrong."

Do not think outside the box!

'I was so angry, I got up and tip-toed out of the meeting. I probably should've stomped.'

Office: Empowerment Drawer.

"It drives me mad when people act as though we had nothing to do except write moronic memorandum..."

'Sorry, you failed the aptitude test.' -'Thankfully I own the company.'

"Is that legal? Can the old man force me to take a performance-enhancing drug."

"I propose a break from the office speak and two minutes of random profanity."

Man running from desk: 'I can't seem to get away from my work lately.'

"I've called this meeting so I could see all of you squirm."

'The company was quite generous. They gave me a whole day off for the funeral.'

'Not my short list, O'Neil! You're on my other list!

'I like thinking inside the box.'

'There always seems to be ONE trouble-maker in the company who gets a sick thrill from rebelling against our corporate culture!'

"The figures for the last quarter are in. We made significant gains in the fifteen-to-twenty-six-year-old age group, but we lost our immortal souls."

"The holidays are finished George, get over it!"

'They traded their 'Casual Fridays' for 'Immature Mondays' . '

'And I see that Derek continues to ignore our company's dress code...'

"If I could quit tomorrow, I'd be gone yesterday."

"I pride myself on being able to walk that fine line between misdemeanor and felony."