Office Culture Enthusiast Pillows

'I see you've heard how we treat 'outsiders'.'

'They appear to be adapting well in their new habitat.'

'I need somebody to run this by legal. Anyone in the office wearing sneakers?'

"Great idea Norman,remember when did I have it?"

'Glad you could make it, G,B - pull up a bean bag chair,'

'Be careful...where there's one, there's two.'

"So, Mr Jones... Do you think you'll fit in here?"

"I know it's awkward with me being the new boss and all....but when you meet me in the halls, don't act like I'm going to eat you alive."

With a great team behind you, you can achieve so much more.

Don't worry. It's just something I like to call the 'Chain of Command...

'CasualFriday will now be known as, 'Groveling Friday,' but you'll be allowed to grovel in casual attire.'

'This firm is committed to diversity -- I have yes-men, si-men, ja-men, oui-men, da-men, hai-men....'

'We've invested heavily - if not alwayes wisely - in talent.'

"I hope they don't expect new associates to dress like that."

"There's a lot of back stabbing going on in this company."

"We've reached the point where the lo mein in the fridge is creating a hostile work environment."

"It's weird, but he does come up with some good ideas in there."

"I have no idea what it is you do around here, but whatever it is, keep up the good work."

"Well, team....time to trade our 'You Got This!' coffee mugs to the 'Mistakes Were Made' mugs."

'I'm sorry son, but for this position, we need somebody who can be absolutely ruthless. '

'I've bee fires as a tea lady...and rehired as a tea related accident prevention consultant at £25,000 a year!'

"I'm not supposed to say anything, but you really aced this round of the interview process."

'Have you worked at a non-profit before?' 'Yes! and believe it or not, they blamed me!'

"Change 'able to work without supervision' to 'able to work under constant surveillance.'"

That's a good question, Ossie... may I call you 'Ossie', Ossie?

'Oh Johnny, oh Johnny! Can you come out for lunch?'

Hang In There, Baby!

"And if he wants to keep his job, the early bird better get me a coffee, too."

"They promoted me from 'office dog' to 'chief canine officer.' I don't get more treats, though, so I think it's more of a lateral move."

"For God's sake, if you're going to take the fall for me, do it like a man."

"They let me keep my cubicle."

"A fellow human being to see Mr. Driscoll."

'I hope you're not threatened by powerful women, because you're fired.'

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

"Staff support"