Office Affair Enthusiast Pillows

'We can't keep meeting in the wind tunnel, Natasha '.

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"How's everybody doing? I'm not boring you, am I?"

"If we can just get beyond this 'I'm the boss' mentality and concentrate on a simple 'What I say goes' outlook, I think this will all work out."

"And where have you previously moused?"

"The article you sent me on how technology causes stress crashed my computer."

"Of course you can resign Ferguson. How would you like to buy back your freedom? Cash, credit card or easy payments?"

'Recent studies in primate colonies suggest that organizational performance can be improved by replacing complicated financial incentives with bananas.'

"...But of course we'll still be friends on Facebook!"

"Here's some of my work for you to do. It should be a refreshing change...for me."

"You're hired. Now, I'll show you your desk, the break room, and the dented wall you're allowed to beat your head against."

"Here's to non-electric sharpeners."

"On a positive note, he's not our boss. He's the guy who stole our boss's identity."

'You're hopeful - worrying about what underwear to wear for the office party!'

"I can't decide who gets the promotion, so we'll settle it with a rope toy Tug O' War."

'Face it, we're never going to reach a consensus.'

'In the computer simulation he said he admired my candor and gave me a raise.'

Should not have put that suggestion in the suggestion box.'

"I was going to tell you it's a jungle out there, but I realize that's probably old news to you."

Determined not to make a fool of himself Mitch keeps practicing every dance move for the Annual Office Christmas Party!

...The computer says you can handle 20 more work

'She finally made employee of the month but she paid the ultimate price.'

'Remember you told me to be friendly to your boss.'

"What's your occupation?"

"It's a shame, excellent recommendations and a superb skill set but lacks the boiling hot all consuming ambition and ruthless desire for self promotion required as head of stationary procurement."

"Confounded spell checker... never catches anything."

"Maybe our beloved founder is trying to tell us something."

Batsford doesn't suffer fools gladly.

'Remember, my door is always open Higgins, just be careful of the trap door.'

'I've collected my memos into one reasonably priced gift book.'

'It's not fair. Women doing the same job I'm doing in this office are being paid more than I am!'

'We're very proud of you, Jenkins. Keep up the good work.'

'Absent friends!'

Depressed Businessman at Office Christmas Party.

"Why, if it isn't Henshaw caught in the Overtime Warp again."