Nuclear Themes Pillows

'Cannonball!'

Putin and Zelensky

Sailor in Car.

On the brink.

Emergency Phone.

Fist Bumper Cars

'Maybe it should be funnier...'

"Just one more thump. . . just one more thump."

'It's the pink spot, Jim lad - them rascals is going to try and tweak my nipples!'

Captain Corcoran, Commander of H.M.S. Pinafore

"Shred the plank."

Cat scratches on a pirate's wooden leg.

Captain Hook getting his hook stuck in the rail, again

Subwoofer

"As night falls, You return to claim what isn't yours. . . come at me, sea devil!!!"

'You don't need a colonoscopy, but I'm sending you for one because, quite frankly, I don't like you.'

'No Jake, I don't want to watch you do it again.'

Bob liked a challenge, and the shipwreck gave him something to get his teeth into.

"I'm referring you to an old gypsy woman."

Pirate captain: 'I'm so embarrassed! I walked around all day with my swash unbuckled!'

'I know it's not around too much this season but I think I have swine flu!'

Hippie on the moon

Celebrity anagrams: Is a salt water rat (Answer: Alastair Stewart)

"Don't trust his tail—I know a scallywag when I see one."

"Quick! Hide the valuables."

"The captain says we have to stay up here until we stop acting so childish."

'He runs this firm like a ship.'

"... And who asked for your opinion, I'd like to know?!"

A castaway on an island with an old TV that's washed ashore, sees two men in an approaching boat marked, 'TV Licensing'.

'I wasn't expecting this when they said they wanted to settle out of court!!'

"But doctor...when I said I wanted to increase my breasts what I meant was..."

Harbor Hotel: 'Absolutely NO swashbuckling after 10 PM'.