Novelty Engineer T-Shirts

"Cool ship, but how's it even going to fit in the lane?"

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

Dog Walking Services

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

Raincloud Umbrella

'What clan do you belong to?'

'I'm so bored - nothing ever happens around here!'

Crap from the future.

Advocado

'You're a genius, Hoppy!'

A man is trying to play golf with a football boot attached to a stick.

Useless add-ons.

Hay Rides $10

Cash Machines From Across the Land

'Sorry, Frank, I know this is your favourite lake, but I just can't eat fish who smoke cigarettes.'

Electronics: Nooks/Crannies

'We just invented cooking yesterday, and already she's serving leftovers!'

"Well - I've either bought a pack of table napkins, or adopted a Siberian tiger cub..."

Mohammad's motors

An experimentalist alarms his guests by describing the appearance of the mushrooms in a dish they have just eaten.

'No, I didn't know it was hunting season - why do you ask?'

Pirate playing pool using his artificial leg as a pool stick.

Toenail clipping missile.

'And a special feature on this model is the diet ice cubes.'

Clock and Watch Shop: Second-Hand Clocks and Minute-Hand Clocks.

"What'd you think the zipper on my face was for?"

Scrooge is visited by the ghost of prehistoric past.

A kid squirting gunk from an umbrella.

Goldie Locks and the three beers.