Novelist T-Shirts

"Remember, now-you're sense, I'm sensibility."

"Yes, but what I really want to do is write children's books."

Novel, Novella, Novellette, Novellini

Young Stephen King

Tolstoy and Dostoevsky plan a collaboration - 'War and Punishment'... it'll make us a bundle.

"Holy cow! What kind of crazy people used to live here anyway?"

'Let me know when you're ready for the Great American tuna fish sandwich.'

Sherlock Holmes with a magnifying glass.

The phones of Dr. Moreau

'126,000 words done...now I just need to work out what order to put them in.'

'It was a last-minute change, but a good one.'

Story Template

"Chapter One: Call me Scooter..."

'No, go ahead and critique my mss. I'm always ok ... after the initial reaction.'

"If you were to boil your book down to a few words, what would be its message?"

I've got all the words I need for my novel, it's just a case of putting them in the right order.

'It was owned by a little old lady. Legally, that's all I can say. She still owns the intellectual property rights to her story.'

"He's very disciplined about his writing, three hours staring at a blank screen every morning and five in the afternoon."

"Whoops - I Accidentally Pressed 'Elevator Pitch.'"

500 pages and one masterpiece later, Stephan makes a horrifying discovery.

Meet The Ghostwriter

'He was a great writer'

Writer and Copywriter

Think.

"'A writer?' she gasped, her perky breasts heaving. 'God I love writers!'"

"I'm sorry-you tapped into something no one cares about."

Steinbeck - stuck on the title page (Grapes of Wrath).

Hemingway's dog meets Faulkner's Dog.

Man types with beer on his computer.

Stephen Fry.

"I've never written anything, but I think I have a good ear for dialogue."

Hardy gets writers block...

'The good news is, you write what you know. Unfortunately, you don't know much.'

He's very disciplined about his writing, three hours staring at a blank screen every morning and five in the afternoon.

"I'm waiting for my imagination to run riot."