Novel Guardian Mugs

"And, for God's sake, don't let anyone finish my novel!"

The Zoo.

"I can't protect you from everything, but I can read you stories that make you believe I can protect you from everything."

"I got a gold star for going the longest without looking at my phone in class."

'Harold, when was the last time you cleaned the pool?!'

"Unfortunately, your son swallowed a great deal of industrial adhesive. But don't worry: Epoxy can be cured."

"Mom, please shake my chair. I'm taking a virtual school bus ride before class begins."

"Tommy!"

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

"Well, young man... just consider yourself grounded!"

'I can't control my anger when people get too close to my kids...'

'Can you tell me what I've written? I can't read!'

'What's wrong with our new shed? Nothing - I'm sat out here guarding it.'

Garden Gnome fishing all the fish for pond.

'What's the big deal about acid rain? Can't we just make alkaline rain to counteract it?'

Monkey-artist

"My mom programmed my toothbrush to follow me until I use it. It's cruel but effective."

'Put a tick under 'very toxic'.' (New Orleans Toxic Clean-Up Team).

Bumble Bee

"Look, it's my word balloon."

A baby playing on a grand piano

"Your momma lied to you, boy."

"Young man, go to your room and stay there until your cerebral cortex matures."

"An educational toy is my immediate goal, but my long range plan is to get him on Jeapordy!"

Biodiversity

'I have answers to the kind of questions no one likes to ask.'

"It's trickle down."

The Gardener's Holiday: Don't leave produce behind you to perish.

Steven had a sneaky suspicion that the local birds were beginning to rely upon here.

'I'll just put them here until the danger of frost passes - probably next April'

'The kids just love doing paint by numbers.'

A drooping plant is watered via an IV tube.