Notary Work Prints

"Signing in my presence isn't enough anymore. You have to sign while I'm in your personal space."

Whats ticking away in YOUR filing system?

'Please put that confusing mess of documents, files and folders where it belongs...in your computer.'

'You're right. Our old safety files have become a safety concern.'

'The job calls for a little filing now and then...'

'It's only fair to warn you that if you get the job there would be a lot of filing involved.'

Bank cashier sits near sign: 'Please do not ask for credit, as refusal often offends'.

'To grow a good beard, have good dental habits. First, brush with a concave brush to clean the teeth's facial surfaces. Then use a convex brush to reach flat surfaces. Then use a scalloped brush to be chic. Then floss to clean between teeth. Then use ...

Cat and INOUT boxes.

Sub Post Office/Sub-Justice

'A 'pregnant pause' is effective only if you've already said something.'

'I hope it's fixed soon. I miss the convenience and friendly beep.'

"I didn't get anything I asked for last year so I want your acceptance of this year's list to be notarized."

'Actually, we were hoping you could loan some money to us.'

Post Office: Why Not E-Mail It?

'Everyone keeps telling me I need my eyes checked, so here I am!'

"You want to withdraw your money? There's a fee for that."

'Miss Roberts, turn off the video camera!'

"I have to be honest. I would really miss it if there were no more Saturday mail!"

Postman walking away from mailbox after putting mail in. Sounds of it eating can be heard.

"Safe FDIC insured, guaranteed 2.65% APY...check out our new Emotional Support CDs."

"I've got your letter in front of me now, sir."

Inuit post arriving by parachute.

'Dang it, nothing but junk mail'

"He's a loose cannon with nothing left to lose, but he's the best damn file clerk I've ever seen."

TELLER, 'Thirty-seven dollars? -- you call THAT overdrawn?'

Remember to always brush your teeth!

"And what about last month, when I was UNDERdrawn?"

'If you only knew what your money costs us!'

'Hello - I've been parachuted in to save the bank.'

"She's always writing in that journal of hers. Maybe she'll be a notary public when she grows up."

"Will you be passing a mailbox?"

"Take off your mailman's uniform before you return home. We have a new dog."

File room: A subsidiary of the black hole of the universe