Nostalgic Scribe T-Shirts

'I still write all my novels longhand.'

"I don't care about the rating on Goodreads. We're reading Cinderella!"

"Dear Wendy, please excuse the tardiness of my response to your recent tweet from Hoboken."

Abandoning the computer for a typewriter.

"Hipsters"

Letter Collecting Nerd

'It's worse than we thought: You've got termites.'

"We've intended to ask you about it for some time, Doctor, but never got around to it."

"Well, Mr. Goddam Fancy-Pants Small-Town-Expose hot shot! What makes you think we don't all have lusty, kiss-and-tell memoirs boiling away inside us?"

"I've learned from the past. Now can we move on?"

Print Suicide

'Lost Diary'

"Hi Mom...do you remember in which grade I was given an award for my excellent performance of the song about little ducks?"

Monks sitting at a row of computers typing up old-fashioned looking manuscripts.

"But if I don't learn handwriting, how will I be able to read Grandma's letters?"

Old cold warriors home: 'By god, I'll tell you who was soft on communism. . .'

'How kids really saw Mr Robinson in computer classes.'

'I must admit, this family reunion hasn't really lived up to my expectations.'

Old Man Journal

Eddie longed for the days when kids played at recess instead of waiting for YouTube moments.

'Humph! When I was your age, I had to do my homework in front of a black and white.'

Every time I get a postcard from your brother, I regret that I carved him out of driftwood.

"This house has been in my family for a considerable period of time."

'I'm so glad this bedtime story comes in audio.'

Warning: Contents may settle over time.

'Dad's old school teacher was really strict. He still has to go back every night, to finish his detention!'

'Are you sure this is the only way to get rid of your writers block?'

Bib's E-Book Readers.

"Police dramas just aren't what they used to be."

My mom says this story is a "real page turner." I have no idea what she means by that.

Homer

"It was a long afternoon with granddad. I got five 'I remember whens' and three 'When I was your age...'."

"The year may be over, but it'll be dragged back up on history tests for years to come."

"My jacket blurbs used to have such conviction, he thought to himself wistfully."

Looking back, I should have said yes when Sophia Loren asked me to elope. Eventually, even hindsight isn't 20/20.