Nonverbal Communication Gifts

"Aren't you aware that 97% of communication is non verbal?"

"I'm fascinated by body language."

"His volumes speak silences."

"His tail has stopped wagging."

Your body language says "no," but your cranial punctuation says "hubba-hubba!" ! !

Thanksgiving Signals

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

"My email is down... talk to me."

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

Campaign for Plain English

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

21st century water cooler conversations.

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

"I think she's figured out what W-A-L-K means."

"This report is mumbo jumbo...I asked for gobbledeeegook!"

"Then we have an unspoken agreement?"

'They don't understand goo-goo-gah-gah. Dumb it down to WHAAAAAH!'

"I can't decide if we're good people who are bad at communicating, or monsters who communicate perfectly."

"National security adviser"

TAP TAP TAP TAP

"I didn't complain, when you crashed the computer."

"The good news is that we do have a little wiggle room."

"Mom! Your cell phone’s ringing ... it’s Dad!"

"Hmmm ... that's interesting. Now, what about ideas that don't suck - do you have any of those?"

"You're such a good listener."